Pre-Valentine's Day Revelation

So I was thinking about Valentine's Day and feeling pretty down. National Single's Awareness Day, huh? It never mattered to me because I always had a boyfriend who brought me flowers, took me to dinner, and otherwise completed me on this most important of Hallmark Holidays. In fact, the last six Valentine's Days I have had a boyfriend. One or the other of them.
I had a Bible study group this afternoon called Knowing God's Will. Our leader asked us to memorize Jeremiah 29:11-12.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,
plans for wholeness and not for evil,
to give you a future and a hope."

I decided to read it over before I did my usual devotions tonight. The first three lines struck me and convicted me about the state of my heart today! I have worried and stressed and wondered and hoped and guessed at what man I might end up with. What man would make me happy and whole. How we will meet and fall in love. What our future will be. I couldn't help, in that line of thought, but wonder what I need to be doing to make sure that I find him. And then wonder when it will be and begin to hope it will be soon, because I don't like being single. So I think, well, I'm here now, so where is he? How much longer? C'mon!

But God says *I* know the plans *I have* for you.
This is not in my control, anymore than this ridiculous weather. It may snow - I will go get my snowscraper and boots. It may rain -I can get my umbrella. Maybe God will be incredibly generous and it will be 80 and sunny tomorrow - I have my sunglasses and sunscreen and I will be laying out! The point is not how can I make the weather do what I want, when I want, why I want. Its - am I prepared for what is coming, whatever it is? Do I have an umbrella, do I have a snowscraper, do I have sunglasses? And am I paying attention enough to know when to call on them?

Knowing who I'm going to marry isn't so easy. But God is in control. And he has given me His Word in order to be prepared for my future. I guess I can think of it as my sunglasses and my sunscreen. When it gets bright, I'll have them with me. When the right guy comes along, I'll be prepared for him to lead me because of the way God is using me, growing me, and teaching me now as I am single. You typically don't go to the store and buy sunscreen when you just laid out for five hours and are burned (though you'll know better next time!). You plan ahead. Before you go out into the sun you get what you will need (if you're not prepared or not awake, well think about what happens when you fall asleep in the sun with no sunscreen on). Cloudy the first day? No problem, you have your Bible, just read. The sun is coming.

How do I know the sun is coming? What if it just rains and rains (or even worse, is cold too)? What if I never get married (even though my heart's desire is to!)? God says he has plans for wholeness for me. I realized my selfishness and shortsightedness here! This means something FAR better than even wholeness in the context of a relationship or marriage with a man. It means wholeness in HIM, our creator! He is promising a relationship with him that will last all this lifetime and into eternity where it will be perfected! It is a marriage, but one far greater than I look forward to here. So there it is - the perpetual bright, sunny day! It IS coming because he has promised. So while I can certainly expect days of rain and snow and trails of all sorts in this life, I should still be carrying around and improving upon my essentials for that day when it will rain no more - the eternal perfect marriage with Christ himself!

God has plans to give me a future and a hope. I think the last paragraph explains this. I can look forward to a future and a hope that will never perish. Above and beyond that though, I looked at Romans 8:32 -

"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all,
how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?"

God also gives us gifts in this life! It is amazing that he should send us Son to die for me a sinner, freely forgive me of all my monstrous sin, grant me eternal life - not just floating around somehwere in cosmic space - but with Him in his very house, and promise me a rich inheritance when I get there, being co-heirs with Christ who died for me, AND on top of all that - which I fully don't deserve and would be fully content with - he gives me gifts here on earth as well!! What an AMAZING God!

I do pray that God gives me the gift of marriage. But I cannot doubt his goodness or sovereignty because my pray is not answered immediately and in exactly the fashion I would like. How arrogant! How sinful I am to let one card-company-fabricated day disarm me in my quest for contentment and happiness in God.
And moreover let it cause me to doubt his goodness and his plan for my life.

So Jesus, then is my valentine, my Lord, my bridegroom, my savior, my king, my shepard, my counselor, my solid rock, my advocate, my deliverer, my high priest,
my life,
my light,
my love.


*What other man could I possibly think I need?